Monday, 1 August 2011

Steve Carell Talks Infidelity: 'Everyone Is Flawed'

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‘Crazy, Stupid, Love': Steve Carell Talks Divorce, Infidelity In New FilmSteve Carrell Crazy Stupid Love

The Huffington Post  First Posted: 7/29/11 09:44 PM ET Updated: 7/30/11 01:20 PM ET

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Divorce, and all the emotional turmoil that accompanies it, isn't usually the basis for Hollywood comedies. But then, Steve Carell’s latest movie "Crazy, Stupid, Love" isn’t your typical Hollywood comedy. In the film, which opened in theatres nationwide Friday, Carell plays Cal, a lovably schlubby fortysomething man with two kids whose long-time wife Emily (Julianne Moore) informs him that she has cheated on him and wants a divorce. Putting up a fight isn’t Cal’s forte: no sooner has she told him she wants out than he’s rolling down their driveway—his driveway—in a U-Haul moving truck, head in hands, on his way to his depressing post-divorce bachelor pad. The marital ups and downs that play out over the course of the next two hours challenge the traditional romantic comedy script in ways we never thought possible (plus there are some decidedly excellent shots of Ryan Gosling's abs--he stars as Jacob, Cal's post-divorce dating and romance guru). Carell recently shared his thoughts about the central role divorce plays in the film with Huffington Post:

When Cal’s co-workers learn he’s getting a divorce, they’re incredibly relieved it’s not something serious--like cancer. That was hilarious. What do you think it says about the way we view divorce nowadays?

I think that’s a very astute scene. Divorce is fairly common these days, and I think many times people disregard the emotional impact that divorce has on a couple and a family, because it happens so frequently. What’s clear in the movie is how powerful and emotionally draining [divorce is]. It’s a huge loss and I think people tend to, I don’t know if trivialize is the right word, but I think they under-appreciate the enormity of the effect a divorce can have on people.

Huffington Post: There are so many elements of the film that HuffPost Divorce readers will be familiar with—things like Cal’s sad post-divorce bachelor pad and his friends having to choose sides after his split. Were you familiar with any of that in your own life?

Steve Carell: Some of my friends have gone through divorce after many, many years of marriage, so several elements of the movie ring true to me. Certainly, getting back into the dating game is a very frightening and daunting element [of the film] that is rooted in reality. I had a friend who, after 25 years of marriage, found himself trying to date again, and it was completely different. Everything had changed, and he had to reacquaint himself. It was funny even talking to him about it. For someone who has been out of the loop, it’s a different world.

HP: Had you ever been through a breakup of that enormity?

SC: Fortunately, no.

HP: There’s a line where Cal’s son says something about your character’s ex-wife, his mom, to the effect of, “She’s your soul mate, don’t give up on her.” Do you believe in soul mates?

SC: I do. I’ve been married 16 years and I believe that I found mine, so I certainly have that to base it on. I think I got lucky and ended up marrying the right person.

HP: Did that inform the way you played Cal?

SC: I think so. I think it also informed why I was attracted to the script. I do believe that you fight for who you believe are the right people in your life and people. Relationships shouldn’t be disposable. If there’s something worth saving—not always the case, some relationships are irreconcilable—but if there is something that you determine is worth saving, then try to do that.

HP: We hear a lot about marriages ending so quickly. From the moment your character’s ex-wife says, “I want a divorce,” there’s an incredibly quick transition to you moving out. Was that on purpose? As a viewer you kind of think, “Wait! Why did that happen so quickly”?

SC: That speaks to my character. It speaks to this guy who so easily walks away from [his marriage]. He’s someone who hasn’t seen any of the warning signs and [doesn’t react] even when faced with this huge piece of information. And you have to ask, is his wife just begging him to respond in some way? And when he doesn’t, that’s his default setting. Even faced with this pending divorce, he doesn’t respond—he won’t engage. And I think that’s really his problem: he isn’t engaged with her, and he needs to be. And once he allows himself to get mad, to become a part of the equation, then things can potentially change—either to move on or to figure out how to make it work.

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HP: It’s interesting that in this movie, the wife has the affair, not the husband, which is the opposite of what we usually see

SC: Yeah that’s one of the things that was very important to me. But I didn’t want her character to be a villain in any way—she’s just a human being. Everyone is flawed and everyone makes mistakes and is culpable. There’s fault on both sides in almost every relationship, so it was important to me that there was responsibility on Cal’s side as well to help make the relationship better. It wasn’t all in her court to figure it out.

That’s also a huge departure from what we usually see in most affair narratives, whether in the media or in the movies. There’s usually a clear villain and a victim, and there wasn’t in this film.

That was a very specific note that I had—that there needs to be movement on both sides. That’s just the reality of it. You can’t speak for every relationship, but more often than not there is responsibility on both sides.

HP: A comedy about divorce: not exactly clear comedy fodder.

SC: Yeah! It’s a tough topic and a challenging sell because here’s a movie about divorce, relationships, and love and it’s also funny. But I think so much humor comes out of pain and growth and forgiveness.


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#ad_bottom_article_text {margin-bottom: 15px} Steve CarellFilmDivorce, and all the emotional turmoil that accompanies it, isn't usually the basis for Hollywood comedies. But then, Steve Carell’s latest movie "Crazy, Stupid, Love" isn’t your typical Hollywood...Divorce, and all the emotional turmoil that accompanies it, isn't usually the basis for Hollywood comedies. But then, Steve Carell’s latest movie "Crazy, Stupid, Love" isn’t your typical Hollywood... Loading...   Steve Carell's "Crazy, Stupid Love" is a surprisingly good movie. 1 day ago from Twitter for iPad Review: Crazy, Stupid, Love, starring Steve Carell and Ryan Gosling 2 days ago from Tweet Button Show more results TOP INFLUENCERS ON THIS TOPIC TOP LINKS ON THIS TOPIC 1 of 4

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You can always re-order comments using the tabs below or change your default by clicking here. View All Favorites Bloggers Recency  |  Popularity Page: 1 2 3 Next › Last »  (3 total) srooge 24 Fans 0 minute ago (12:04 AM) Animals do what they do and human's are just another animal on this planet. srooge: Animals do what they do and human's are just another http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/srooge/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100142962.htmlHistory | Permalink  | photo Putty Pants 5 Fans 1 hour ago (10:58 PM) loved the movie. Carrell is simply a very good actor...he­'s funny, sensitive. Had a lump in my throat several times and laughed a lot. We've seen two really good rom-coms..­.crazy, stupid, love and friends with benefits. Highly recommende­d to everyone. It's so refreshing to see good rom-c-coms instead of all those reckage films...mu­rder, mayhem...I­'m so tired of all that male testoseron­e stuff. More girls and women would go to movies if they had less sexual content and more about love and comedy....­friends with benefits would have been better without seeing the explicit sex even though it was handled pretty well for as much as was in it. Putty_Pants: loved the movie. Carrell is simply a very good actor...he's http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Putty_Pants/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100135243.htmlHistory | Permalink  | TomMartin 44 Fans 6 hours ago (6:28 PM) While everyone is flawed, adulterers are more flawed than most non-adulte­rers. TomMartin: While everyone is flawed, adulterers are more flawed than most http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/TomMartin/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100097233.htmlHistory | Permalink  | photo HUFFPOST BLOGGER James Napoli I've Been Thinking 79 Fans 10 hours ago (2:08 PM) I am waiting for the day when Steve Carell decides out of the blue to have a probing discussion about divorce entirely unmotivate­d by the fact that he has a movie coming out. I will be waiting a long time. hp_blogger_James Napoli: I am waiting for the day when Steve Carell decides http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/hp_blogger_James Napoli/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100062216.htmlHistory | Permalink  | photo Seamus1975 11 Fans 11 hours ago (12:59 PM) What's with the non-stop promotion of this move? Seamus1975: What's with the non-stop promotion of this move? http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Seamus1975/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100052480.htmlHistory | Permalink  | photo ModeratorAde 15 Fans 10 hours ago (1:55 PM) $$$$$ ModeratorAde: $$$$$ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/ModeratorAde/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100060383.htmlHistory | Permalink  | photo HUFFPOST SUPER USER maigesheng 223 Fans 11 hours ago (12:50 PM) I know a guy that just got bored with his wife, after about two years. They have a baby, thats about a year and a half. The guy started cheating with his last ex girlfriend­.

The wife has no real family network and is moving out of state to try to figure out how to take care of herself and her new child.

I believe the guy looks at it like :im onlly human."

What a #$%##@ cop out. maigesheng: I know a guy that just got bored with his http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/maigesheng/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100051137.htmlHistory | Permalink  | photo angeleyes36190 1 Fans 11 hours ago (12:40 PM) First of all, what is everyone so down on Steve? He's a good actor! Also, maybe he doesn't know too much about how divorce or infidelity works because he's been in a loving relationsh­ip for so long. So don't get so down on him for having an opinion- regardless of if he's ill informed or not. And thirdly, cheating is bad. That's obvious. But what people don't realize is that marriage, friendship etc takes effort and learning that you won't always have instant gratificat­ion. Not everyone knows that and it leads to cheating and divorce. People just need to grow up. and parents need to teach their kids this! angeleyes36190: First of all, what is everyone so down on Steve? http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/angeleyes36190/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100049501.htmlHistory | Permalink  | photo Bladesmith Hammering out some red hot truth. 220 Fans 12 hours ago (12:11 PM) So his character is emotionall­y detached, and refuses to engage at any level. Her character has spent their years together trying to get him to engage with her at a deeper level than just the surface stuff. Neither one communicat­es very well. Desperate, she has an affair, trying to feel a connection to SOMEONE, but it doesn't fulfill her. And still they don't manage to communicat­e their feelings to each other, supposedly the person they are closet to in the world. Neither will seek counseling­, because..w­ell, counseling still has a stigma to it even today. So they divorce, because thats easier than looking inward. It's what you do, these days. And divorced, they discover that they are miserable and empty without each other. By sheer force of loss, they learn to engage each other, open up to each other, and express the love they have for each other, and get back together. Bladesmith: So his character is emotionally detached, and refuses to engage http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Bladesmith/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100045216.htmlHistory | Permalink  | photo madcityy 26 Fans 12 hours ago (11:47 AM) PLEASEEEEE­EEEEEEEEEE­EEEEEEEEEE madcityy: PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/madcityy/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100041740.htmlHistory | Permalink  | photo HUFFPOST SUPER USER RhiannonRings Childfree and loving it! 75 Fans 12 hours ago (11:46 AM) Good! I'll see anything Moore does. RhiannonRings: Good! I'll see anything Moore does. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/RhiannonRings/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100041443.htmlHistory | Permalink  | colin72 58 Fans 13 hours ago (11:23 AM) Why wasn't the most important question asked?

What's going on with your hair? colin72: Why wasn't the most important question asked? What's going on http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/colin72/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100038215.htmlHistory | Permalink  | undertheinfluence 169 Fans 13 hours ago (11:21 AM) Is this movie going to make the arguement that when you can't keep your promise to God, and to the person whom you married, that it's okay to blame it on your 'flaws?'

That like saying...I­'m not perfect..s­o I'm just going to F#@& everyone I see.

Okay..soun­ds good to me. undertheinfluence: Is this movie going to make the arguement that when http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/undertheinfluence/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100037994.htmlHistory | Permalink  | photo monsterna 24 Fans 11 hours ago (1:04 PM) No. Maybe because God doesn't exist. monsterna: No. Maybe because God doesn't exist. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/monsterna/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100053287.htmlHistory | Permalink  | photo ToriD 0 Fans 11 hours ago (1:21 PM) I made a promise to myself and to my husband, no to some invisible man in the sky. ToriD: I made a promise to myself and to my husband, http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/ToriD/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100055658.htmlHistory | Permalink  | photo Box500 143 Fans 7 hours ago (4:37 PM) That invisible man that throws fire when he's mad? He's scary don't ya know Box500: That invisible man that throws fire when he's mad? He's http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Box500/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100082583.htmlHistory | Permalink  | brokendrum 3 Fans 13 hours ago (10:51 AM) Steve is right about the lucky part. I didn't always believe this way, but after a painful loss, I now realize how naive I used to be. I believed in karma, good people attract good life, bad people reap what they sow,etc. Bad things happen to good people everyday and it's no reflection of universal justice because it doesn't make sense. Divorce is devastatin­g and everyday very good partners get dealt unfair,unw­arranted blows that destroy their marriages. Steve is indeed lucky in love and aware that it's luck and not his good deeds that have kept his marriage of 16 years going strong. brokendrum: Steve is right about the lucky part. I didn't always http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/brokendrum/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100033827.htmlHistory | Permalink  | garystartswithg my micro-bio is bigger than your micro-bio 575 Fans 13 hours ago (10:40 AM) Sounds like more porn for boomers -- everyone sucks, i am already guilty by default, so nothing is my fault. garystartswithg: Sounds like more porn for boomers -- everyone sucks, i http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/garystartswithg/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100032332.htmlHistory | Permalink  | Dashlar 2 Fans 12 hours ago (12:07 PM) To me it sounds like a fictional movie. Dashlar: To me it sounds like a fictional movie. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/Dashlar/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100044668.htmlHistory | Permalink  | photo jf12 I am small, I can barely contain myself 196 Fans 14 hours ago (10:19 AM) She is a villian. She did the dastardly deed in order to be bad, and to end her marriage. The end. jf12: She is a villian. She did the dastardly deed in http://www.huffingtonpost.com/social/jf12/crazy-stupid-love-steve-carell_n_913838_100029704.htmlHistory | Permalink  |     Page: 1 2 3 Next › Last »  (3 total) new comment(s) on this entry — Click to refreshspinnerLoading comments… PHOTO GALLERIES JLo And Marc: Scenes From A Marriage VOTE: Which Star Couple Has The Most Stable... JLo's Many Men: A Look Back QUIZ: Test Your Knowledge Of Celebrity Splits FOLLOW US Facebook Twitter Apple Android Blackberry Email Rss Connect with your friends Check out stories you might like,
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4 Powered by TopsyHOT ON TWITTER2RgnQXLokElFimSGDV8i8f8ym0hHXTufiJKomeBLqmM3QvAVQ0trgDrc%2BaNUFZ3B1 of 2 RT @charlesfrith Alec Baldwin: It's Time To Suck It Up And Pay Our Bill http://j.mp/qwTE12 charlesfrith Alec Baldwin: It's Time To Suck It Up And Pay Our Bill RT @alicam Biodiversity On Earth Plummets, Despite Growth in Protected Habitats http://alic.am/o4c4aT alicam Biodiversity On Earth Plummets, Despite Growth in Protected Habitats HUFFPOST'S BIG NEWS PAGES Iman Somali Famine WATCH: Iman On Somalia's 'Heartbreaking' Famine (VIDEO)Somalia Wisconsin Recall Elections Fire Fire Destroys Offices Of Group Active In Wisconsin Recall Effort Activism Reid Reid Vote Delayed To Sunday As Hints Of Deal EmergeWhite House Afghanistan Arrests Army Turncoat Afghans Arrest Taliban Leader, Army TurncoatWar on Terror Clark Gables Grandson Arrested Clark Gable's Grandson Charged With Shining Laser At Police Chopper California Business Terror Businesses Play Critical Role In Thwarting TerrorBusiness F16 Crash F-16 Flies Off Runway At Wisconsin Air Show, Pilot Uninjured (VIDEO)Most Popular Norway Terror Attacks Anders Behring Breivik, Norway Killings Suspect, Was Considering Other TargetsEurope Jolie Pitt Angelina Jolie: Making Fewer Films As I Get OlderAngelina Jolie more big news pages »  
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